Life Advice/ Relationship Advice From My Grandma

Today I had a really long conversation with my grandma about life and relationships. Throughout the conversation she shared so many important bits of wisdom that she has learned throughout her life and I thought it would be really valuable to share the wisdom with more people. So without further adieu here’s what she told me.

  • When you start dating someone, always try to have a good relationship with their family. If your relationship gets really serious and you end up marrying that person, you marry their family too. Your significant other will never stop being someone’s son or daughter, they will never stop being someone’s brother or sister or cousin or niece or nephew. Make sure you are on good terms with their family.
  • Do not ever abandon your family. Family is forever. Your family may be problematic and they may not understand you but in your times of need, chances are that your family will be the ones who want to hold you up and help you out. Don’t let your relationship with your family go to waste.
  • Learn essential survival skills. Learn how to cook and how to clean. Learn how to manage your money and how to treat other people. You’ll need these skills throughout your life and you will need them in a relationship too. They’re considered essential for a reason.
  • Talk to your significant other. If you have big life plans, tell your significant other about them. Make sure that they understand where you’re coming from and make sure that you both understand how these life plans will affect both of you. If you have a problem, work it out. Watch what you say but make sure that you feel free to speak your mind.
  • If your significant other is better at handling certain things than you are, let them handle it. Sometimes you might be convinced that you have to take on certain responsibilities because you’re the head of the household or because you’re the woman in the relationship or because society says you should take care of those responsibilities but every relationship is different. If your significant other is better at handling the money, let them handle it even if society says you should. If you are better at planning family affairs, you do it despite what society says.
  • Dating someone is not all fun and games. You date someone so that you can get to know them and their values. Dating someone is a really important time in your connection with someone and you need to take it seriously. If you have a lot of problems with someone in the dating stage of the relationship, chances are it will get worse if you get married. The problems that seem small when you’re dating become huge when you’re married.
  • When you have kids, every big decision you make will affect them. If you decide to move houses, your kids will be affected. If you decide to get a divorce, your kids will be affected. Whenever you become a parent, remember to always be conscious of how your kids will be affected.
  • A foundation of faith is important for every relationship. If you believe in God, bring God into the relationship and make Him the center of your relationship. Having something bigger to believe in is really helpful in life.
  • Concern yourself with yourself. People will criticize you, people will ridicule you and comment on anything that has to do with you, and people will have their opinions of you and how you go about your life but you should just be concerned with your life. If you’re happy, it does not matter at all what people have to say about you. Your life is your concern, not theirs.
  • That being said, don’t waste your time criticizing other people. It’s a waste of time.
  • When you get into a relationship or when you become a parent, you’ll have to make sacrifices. Be willing to make those sacrifices. It will make your life so much easier if you are willing and able to make those sacrifices than if you try to fight it.
  • Respect your family. As aforementioned, family is important and forever. Respect them and treat them right. Most of the time they just want to have a good relationship with you and maybe they don’t know how but that doesn’t mean they don’t deserve respect.
  • Your significant other’s parents want to have a good relationship with you especially if they can tell you make their child happy. It might be intimidating to befriend them but do try. Befriending your significant other’s parents is good for you, your significant other, your future, etc. and if the two of you end up getting married and having children, it’s a good way to keep the grandparents involved.
  • Don’t rush into things. You have your whole life ahead of you. Make mistakes and take your time with everything.
  • Remember the qualities that you admire in your parents and look for that in a partner. The best traits that your parents possess are the ones that bring you comfort and peace and the feeling of security and you’ll want the person you spend your life with to have those same traits.
  • No matter how much you like someone as a person or in a relationship, if they disrespect you or your family, drop them immediately. Never just let someone disrespect you. You are not a doormat to be walked all over.
  • Know what you want in your future and when you get into a relationship, tell your significant other what it is that you want. If you want kids, tell them. If you want to live in a two-story house one day, tell them. If you want to live in a completely different country, tell them. It’s important that they know. Make sure you’re firm in what you want but don’t be so stubborn and unwilling to compromise that you lose a good person.
  • Don’t trash talk someone in front of children especially not if that someone is family. Trash talking someone in front of kids sets a really bad example and it puts bad thoughts into their heads so it’s best to just wait until you can speak without a child hearing or just not trash talking a person at all.
  • Hear your parents out. As a teenager, you might think that their life advice is annoying but they’re trying to protect you and give you some valuable information that they have learned from the mistakes they’ve made. Listen to them. They just want the best for you.
  • Be grateful for everything that you have because not everyone gets as good of a life as you do.
  • Don’t sacrifice your future for your significant other but make sure that you both know what the future holds.
  • You may not end up with the person you thought you were going to spend your whole life with and that’s okay.
  • Treat your significant other the way you would want someone to treat your future son or daughter.
  • You’re never too old to whatever you want. Age is just a number.
  • Go out and meet new people. You’ll learn a lot from them and form some incredible connections.
  • Try to be a positive aspect of people’s lives. Help people when they need help and support them when they need support. Be there for people and try to influence them positively.
  • You make your own future. Sure life gets in the way sometimes but where you end up is up to you so make your future as bright as it can possibly be.

Finally, she said, ” Not everything is going to go the way you think it is and not everything is going to go the way that you’ve planned but be grateful for the things that do go right. You have one life to live. Make it the best life that you can and be happy with what you’re given.”

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