The journey to self-love is ongoing.
It might start by learning what self-love even is. It sounds kind of vain and egocentric, doesn’t it? It sounds a little like you’re dedicating all of your love to yourself and not spreading that love to others. Really though, self-love is a lot of things! It’s making sure you eat enough or making sure you sleep the right amount. It’s loving the way you dress or taking time out of your busy schedule to do things you love. That is self-love. That is determining that you are worthy of love and acceptance and giving yourself what you deserve.
Then, the journey to self-love might move into realizing the places you are lacking. For me, I know that a part of my self-love journey I’m stumped on has to do with loving what I see in the mirror. Some days it’s easy, others… not so much. But, like I said, the journey to self-love is ongoing and I have to work on it daily. Once you realize what aspects of self-love are lacking, you can work on improving that. So, if you need to work on making more time for things you love, you can look at your schedule and see where you might be able to fit that in. Or, if you need to work on loving what you see in the mirror, you might think of the things you do already like and then slowly spread that love everywhere else. Say some positive affirmations. Take your time. You have your whole life to work on self-love.
The next step is realizing that your journey to self-love is not going to look the same as my journey, nor is it going to look the same as your best friend’s journey or your sibling’s journey. Everyone experiences self-love differently and that’s okay. Everyone does different things to express their love for themselves. Personally, I take the time to write things I care about like this blog or my little submissions to magazines. That might not be your thing though. You might prefer taking baths or treating yourself with delicious meals. It doesn’t matter what your form of self-love is, the most important part of it all is that you keep going! Keep making yourself feel loved as much as possible even if your version of doing that doesn’t match everyone else’s. That being said, there will be days where loving yourself seems impossible. There will be days where you just can’t even bring yourself to say a nice thing about yourself or to take care of yourself in any way. And that’s okay. As long as there is some determination to pick yourself up and try again a different day, you will be fine. Reaching a place where self-love comes naturally or even just more frequently will take effort and persistence.
Writer and influencer Nikia Phoenix said something about self-love that really stuck with me. She said that the journey of self-love never ends, “but when you love yourself you can recognize the beauty in humanity.” Self-love isn’t a selfish thing. When you love yourself and become more confident, you get out of your head and open your eyes to the world more. You stop worrying about what other people will think and instead start trying all the crazy things you always wanted to try. You start seeing other people showing their own versions of self-love and it’s beautiful. Self-love lets you grow to where you can appreciate yourself, but you can still see the beauty in others. If you’re intentional about self-love, your view on the world as a whole changes.